“If Nietzsche is right that we must murder the feelings that want to kill the lonely, I had not begun that conversation with myself. I had murdered my body instead.” If woken do murder the feelings that want to kill the lonely, do our bodies get to live? And then thrive in that loneliness? A crime to the patriarchy.:)
Gorgeous framing with the Sotomayor opening theme and then reprise at the end. The music you make is wonderful. This one feels like a late Beethoven quartet in its range and intensity.
In my judgment, significant internal feelings are expressed in this chapter from an attractive ‘firefly.’ The flickers that stuck with me, not the floor, are the new ‘reveals' that you regularly accept dinner and movie invitations from D. “Does he want me?’ you ask. Sotomayor probably can’t answer.
The intimacies, misdirected lies, truths, half-truths, the sensualities of living, and the way things last and then end. So much contained in this chapter.
I think it comes down to the question of what YOU want and need. If you want to marry again, then brushing a man or any man like a., as talented as he is at camouflage or not, off the cutting board altogether, crumbs and all, is necessary. It doesn't matter how great the sex was or not. If it is marriage you want, and if you still have religious insecurities dwelling within, then clear the cobwebs as well so you don't get tempted by so many flies. However, if you want to explore your sexuality, which for a writer is one of the strongest voices within, then what you do with whom is your own business and you don't need to be in a brothel to explore with an advantage. Again, for a writer, getting in touch with the oral leads to a true understanding of the moral. In my vast exploration because I took my father's words seriously, "Love Making is an Art Form," orgasm is the key. Few women have the stomach necessary to truly explore their desire, eroticism, and need to express the deepest illuminations within. Few men can give what a woman needs to explore her orgasmic panorama. Regarding Sotomayor, the fact that boy left to buy a boat and marry someone younger, the truth is few men can handle women that put career before man's career/needs/time constraints. Sotomayor may be lonely again, but in her deepest and wisest heart, she knew the gift he gave her, even though his needs couldn't be satisfied with her limits and obligations. In today's world men have learned they can explore and don't have to dangle a ring to do so. Women really must reckon what they truly get from marriage and if it is necessary anymore to be "appropriate" in the modern world.
When a writer is really, really gifted, and you are, she has enormous latitude to share deeply without total vulnerability. Talent is a skin. Yours is thick. If you weren’t gifted your work would be disconcerting for a reader, but yours never is.
Whoo hoo! What a roller coaster chapter Mary. Loop dee loops, sharp turns too. A couple of outright swoons, esp. the parts about your parents. Coming back to this story is better than reading it the first time.
Btw: to clarify swoon, I meant the emotional reaction of love I feel for the bold honesty in your writing. Not the emotional pain in this chapter. Which I felt deeply as I read it.
What a chapter, Mary. So sensual and by that I mean how you incorporate details though the senses. As a Catholic, I can tell you that a. was 1) bonkers and 2) incorrect. Pope John XXIII during Vatican II said Catholics and the Catholic Church should no longer convert or terrorize the Jewish community (the later part he put much more diplomatically and Popishly). Any Catholic who says that has no idea what they are talking about and need to be ostracized. The latter is my idea.
Ah, so kind you are. Still, I say: We write the unsayable. Do you agree? and here's another thought: You, already so accomplished, consider the free write here. You could surprise yourself at what you may say and what may be hard but worth it, dear Laura: https://marytabor.substack.com/p/think-of-unpacking-a-suitcase-to and if you do the free write, post a piece in comments or send to me. Hélène Cixoux says, “The only book that is worth writing is the one we don’t have the courage or strength to write."
You are so encouraging ans sweet, Mary. You're also kind to call me "so accomplished." I don't feel that way at all.
I will do that freewrite. The past month I've been thinking with I'll I've been through with my MS and trying to have a writing career abs finish my first novel that I should write a memoir. What's stopping me is that certain people in my life would not be portrayed the best. Ableism is strong. I've also been abused.
Write it! My course can help you, too--it's not only for beginners and if you comment and post in comments, I'll reply and help as much as I can. Go for it, Laura, because it's yours!
You are so raw and honest, Mary. I feel like you give us all permission to do the same, to be brave with our writing and sharing here. Thank you.
Oh, Ollie, thank you so. I read you and you are doing exactly that! Hear! Hear! for you! xo ~ Mary
“If Nietzsche is right that we must murder the feelings that want to kill the lonely, I had not begun that conversation with myself. I had murdered my body instead.” If woken do murder the feelings that want to kill the lonely, do our bodies get to live? And then thrive in that loneliness? A crime to the patriarchy.:)
I guess thrive in the loneliness ... and that is living ... yes?
Gorgeous framing with the Sotomayor opening theme and then reprise at the end. The music you make is wonderful. This one feels like a late Beethoven quartet in its range and intensity.
Oh, man, talk about making this writer feel the journey that. so real, so heartbreaking, so full of self-discovery is worth writing about.
In my judgment, significant internal feelings are expressed in this chapter from an attractive ‘firefly.’ The flickers that stuck with me, not the floor, are the new ‘reveals' that you regularly accept dinner and movie invitations from D. “Does he want me?’ you ask. Sotomayor probably can’t answer.
Bill, m y beloved reader, you are probably correct ... We'll see ...
"Bought a boat? Gimme a break."
The intimacies, misdirected lies, truths, half-truths, the sensualities of living, and the way things last and then end. So much contained in this chapter.
Thank you--and on point, as usual, grand writer.
I think it comes down to the question of what YOU want and need. If you want to marry again, then brushing a man or any man like a., as talented as he is at camouflage or not, off the cutting board altogether, crumbs and all, is necessary. It doesn't matter how great the sex was or not. If it is marriage you want, and if you still have religious insecurities dwelling within, then clear the cobwebs as well so you don't get tempted by so many flies. However, if you want to explore your sexuality, which for a writer is one of the strongest voices within, then what you do with whom is your own business and you don't need to be in a brothel to explore with an advantage. Again, for a writer, getting in touch with the oral leads to a true understanding of the moral. In my vast exploration because I took my father's words seriously, "Love Making is an Art Form," orgasm is the key. Few women have the stomach necessary to truly explore their desire, eroticism, and need to express the deepest illuminations within. Few men can give what a woman needs to explore her orgasmic panorama. Regarding Sotomayor, the fact that boy left to buy a boat and marry someone younger, the truth is few men can handle women that put career before man's career/needs/time constraints. Sotomayor may be lonely again, but in her deepest and wisest heart, she knew the gift he gave her, even though his needs couldn't be satisfied with her limits and obligations. In today's world men have learned they can explore and don't have to dangle a ring to do so. Women really must reckon what they truly get from marriage and if it is necessary anymore to be "appropriate" in the modern world.
So grateful you are reading. Hope you will continue to comment.
When a writer is really, really gifted, and you are, she has enormous latitude to share deeply without total vulnerability. Talent is a skin. Yours is thick. If you weren’t gifted your work would be disconcerting for a reader, but yours never is.
More.
Thank you so, dear reader and beautiful prose writer who sings ...
Whoo hoo! What a roller coaster chapter Mary. Loop dee loops, sharp turns too. A couple of outright swoons, esp. the parts about your parents. Coming back to this story is better than reading it the first time.
Wow of a comment, dear friend.
Btw: to clarify swoon, I meant the emotional reaction of love I feel for the bold honesty in your writing. Not the emotional pain in this chapter. Which I felt deeply as I read it.
What a chapter, Mary. So sensual and by that I mean how you incorporate details though the senses. As a Catholic, I can tell you that a. was 1) bonkers and 2) incorrect. Pope John XXIII during Vatican II said Catholics and the Catholic Church should no longer convert or terrorize the Jewish community (the later part he put much more diplomatically and Popishly). Any Catholic who says that has no idea what they are talking about and need to be ostracized. The latter is my idea.
So helpful and kind, Laura. This chapter was hard to post because of its intensity and bareness (If that's a word?).
I imagine. I've hardly written memoir for that very reason.
Ah, so kind you are. Still, I say: We write the unsayable. Do you agree? and here's another thought: You, already so accomplished, consider the free write here. You could surprise yourself at what you may say and what may be hard but worth it, dear Laura: https://marytabor.substack.com/p/think-of-unpacking-a-suitcase-to and if you do the free write, post a piece in comments or send to me. Hélène Cixoux says, “The only book that is worth writing is the one we don’t have the courage or strength to write."
You are so encouraging ans sweet, Mary. You're also kind to call me "so accomplished." I don't feel that way at all.
I will do that freewrite. The past month I've been thinking with I'll I've been through with my MS and trying to have a writing career abs finish my first novel that I should write a memoir. What's stopping me is that certain people in my life would not be portrayed the best. Ableism is strong. I've also been abused.
Write it! My course can help you, too--it's not only for beginners and if you comment and post in comments, I'll reply and help as much as I can. Go for it, Laura, because it's yours!
I'll start with the freewrite. Thanks for the encouragement, Mary.
Intense and admirable vulnerability, Mary.
Ah, such a good soul, you have, David. I see it here and in your own writing.
Fantastic tapestry here, Mary.
What a generous comment. My heart goes out to you.
Hah, that’s one of my favourite blessings - my Irish granny used it all the time. With thanks and in return.