How interesting, Mary. Perhaps I've commented on this before, but I am not a rom-com person, being more of the psychological thriller bent. I wonder if this was always so, if a film like "Jacob's Ladder," seems to lie closer to the truth to me, hence my preference? I also remember seeing "Love, Actually" as a matinee with a girlfriend I'd been living with for a year, how it clarified things for me about us in exactly the opposite way that it did for her, how we came home and she asked if I'd ever thought about marriage, and it made me cry, and then she knew that we were done. What a cruel shock that must have been for her. Maybe my view of rom-coms as fundamentally dishonest stems from that.
Why, Josh, did you cry when she asked you that? Is there a hook to _Love Actually_ that I'm missing? The rom-com view of life is certainly the good, the bad and the foolish of my experience but I still find, even in _Runaway Bride_, wisdom, as I quote here in this post. Whether or not that is reality remains a big question, for sure.
I cried because I'd been miserable for a while and had been avoiding breaking up. Her trust, and her hope that we had a future, made me feel lonely and ashamed. I didn't want to hurt her, but there was no way around it then.
Yes, I think it's clarifying to see people in love -- especially when you've been in denial about having fallen out of love. I had the same experience at a wedding last spring. No coincidence that we decided to divorce soon after.
This thought is not original to me, but I wonder if the rom-com split between men and women might stem from a deeper cultural rift between the genders, which sometimes gets simplified as a good/evil divide, women as angelic, men as driven by a baser nature. I wonder if this makes some men feel that the rom-com plot is thus dishonest, that it presents men in a light that doesn't ring true with how they feel they are more commonly perceived, or with their own internalization of that cultural messaging? Thinking about this alongside Richard Reeves's recent post.
Fascinating, intriguing. "Falling out of love" I see as a complex question. And I guess I'm exploring that q. through the good, the bad and the foolish of me (to say this briefly).
Masterful.
Oh, my gosh. 💞
You’re spinning around. Patis sounds like a good trip. Why not?
Exactly, Bill? That's what I said to myself: Why not?
I loved this so much, Mary - how you weave all the parts of your story together is utterly mesmerising. Another beautiful read. ♥️
Oh, that is so kind, lovely Rebecca. Thank you so ...
😘
Intriguing, and I found the closing part of this quite beautiful, Mary. So many disparate ingredients that blend into a lovely whole.
The comment, Jeffrey, on the writing made my day, as the writing is what saves me.
And it's the writing that we come back to
Hope so ... xo ~Mary
How interesting, Mary. Perhaps I've commented on this before, but I am not a rom-com person, being more of the psychological thriller bent. I wonder if this was always so, if a film like "Jacob's Ladder," seems to lie closer to the truth to me, hence my preference? I also remember seeing "Love, Actually" as a matinee with a girlfriend I'd been living with for a year, how it clarified things for me about us in exactly the opposite way that it did for her, how we came home and she asked if I'd ever thought about marriage, and it made me cry, and then she knew that we were done. What a cruel shock that must have been for her. Maybe my view of rom-coms as fundamentally dishonest stems from that.
Why, Josh, did you cry when she asked you that? Is there a hook to _Love Actually_ that I'm missing? The rom-com view of life is certainly the good, the bad and the foolish of my experience but I still find, even in _Runaway Bride_, wisdom, as I quote here in this post. Whether or not that is reality remains a big question, for sure.
I cried because I'd been miserable for a while and had been avoiding breaking up. Her trust, and her hope that we had a future, made me feel lonely and ashamed. I didn't want to hurt her, but there was no way around it then.
Such sensitivity, Josh. Perhaps, Love Actually helped you decide? Or do you discount that?
Yes, I think it's clarifying to see people in love -- especially when you've been in denial about having fallen out of love. I had the same experience at a wedding last spring. No coincidence that we decided to divorce soon after.
This thought is not original to me, but I wonder if the rom-com split between men and women might stem from a deeper cultural rift between the genders, which sometimes gets simplified as a good/evil divide, women as angelic, men as driven by a baser nature. I wonder if this makes some men feel that the rom-com plot is thus dishonest, that it presents men in a light that doesn't ring true with how they feel they are more commonly perceived, or with their own internalization of that cultural messaging? Thinking about this alongside Richard Reeves's recent post.
Fascinating, intriguing. "Falling out of love" I see as a complex question. And I guess I'm exploring that q. through the good, the bad and the foolish of me (to say this briefly).
Love it.
Fond memories of The Runaway Bunny, Goodnight Moon was another favourite.
Stuck-in a good way with these: discovery after the destruction and how in absence , there's a chance to see ... thought-provoking piece.
Love your read, too, Isabelle.